...

"Hold me now I need to feel relief
Like I never wanted anything
I suppose I'll let this go and find a reason I'll hold on to
I'm so ashamed of defeat
And I'm out of reason to believe in me
I'm out of trying to get by

I'm so afraid of the gift you give me
I don't belong here and I'm not well
I'm so ashamed of the lie I'm living
right on the wrong side of it all

I can't face myself when I wake up
And look inside a mirror
I'm so ashamed of that thing
I suppose I'll let it go
till I have something more to say for me
I'm so afraid of defeat
And I'm out of reason to believe in me
I'm out of trying to defy

I'm so afraid of the gift you give me
I don't belong here and I'm not well
I'm so ashamed of the lie I'm living
right on the wrong side of it all

Hold me now I need to feel complete
Like I matter to the one I need

I'm so afraid of the gift you give me
I don't belong here and I'm not well
I'm so ashamed of the lie I'm living

right on the wrong side of it all

Now I'm ashamed of this
I Am So Ashamed Of This
Now I'm so ashamed of me
I Am So Ashamed Of Me"

Seether - The gift...

yey, teardrop again.

i'm sorry for everything..
i'm really sorry, but i don't want
i don't want to change..
i don't know how..
and i don't want happiness
if after five minutes i'll be bleeding again.

effy's song - silenze

"People think that i'm just a rock
But they can't understand my thoughts
So why I need to talk to them
If they cannot see?

I'm sick of cigarrettes
Sick of all these pills
But if i don't take it I can't feel myself real

I just can't ask for pardon
'Cause I destroy the things that I touch
Life is a mess for me
That's the reason I can't love"

quit: Begins today.

mientras iba en el bus..
Pensando.
Su situación me ha hecho replantearme mi propia vida.
El hecho de que me estoy autodestruyendo, de forma consciente
No es lo mejor.
Y no puedo dar el tiempo que me queda por hecho.
Debo dejarlo antes de que sea demasiado tarde
Y me arrepienta.
Debo dejarlo, e intentar seguir sin ayuda.
Realmente no sé como.
Pero supongo que como todo en mi vida, lo averiguaré mientras pase.
aunque realmente, no quiera dejarlo.
Para poder cumplir el supuesto sueño de ayudarlos,
Debo seguir con vida.
i have to quit, right?, if i wanna do what i want, i have to keep myself alive.
es la única forma, si realmente quiero lográr mis supuestas metas.
So, i'm beginning to quit, literaly.
Espero que aparezca algo que me ayude a lograrlo,
Sin embargo, de todas formas lo tendré que hacer por mi cuenta.
Como siempre há sido.

happy day daddy
wherever you are..
have a nice day...
:)

to nobody.

"Mira
Hacia arriba
Y tú verás
Una estrella fugaz
Que te dirá
Nada
Que quieras escuchar
Que tú quieras oír.

Para
Vuelve a mirar
A dónde va
Pronto lo sabrás.

Esta galaxia te vas a ir
Te queda poco por vivir
Y si piensas que vino solo por ti
Pues no es así
Poco a poco
Verás como viene
También por mí.

Le alcanzaras
Comprenderás
A donde va
En la vía láctea
Ya no estarás
No te preocupes
Te esperare
En la galaxia 69.

Después de las 10
En la galaxia 69."

te esperaré, nadie.

me siento enferma realmente.
Tomar, no se cuando coño terminare de entender
que no me hace absolutamente nada bien.
odio este dia, seriously.
This is a mess, and i can't seem to find my exit.
i want a hug, but i guess i don't need it.
i need a cigarette, but guess i won't have it.
so, just have to wait ofr tomorrow..
a perfect excuse
to keep going on :l
i'm so fucking tired.
en serio, estoy cansada de esta vida.
Y pensar que tan solo van 17.

como detesto mi memoria.
odio recordar, lo odio las mil y una veces.
everybody walks away.
But i still here.
...Odio recordar. seriously
but, meh, i don't give a shit.
*ignoring-forgettin-erasing*
Done :)

"Hope dangles on a string
Like slow spinning redemption
Winding in and winding out
The shine of it has caught my eye

And roped me in
So mesmerizing, so hypnotizing
I am captivated

I am Vindicated
I am selfish
I am wrong
I am right
I swear I'm right
I swear I knew it all along

And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself

So clear
Like the diamond in your ring
Cut to mirror your intentions
Oversized and overwhelmed
The shine of which has caught my eye
And rendered me so isolated, so motivated
I am certain now that

So turn
Up the corners of your lips
Part them and feel my finger tips
Trace the moment, fall forever
Defense is paper thin
Just one touch and I'd be in
Too deep now to ever swim against the current
So let me slip away
So let me slip against the current
So let me slip away "

malditos sueños bizarros.
Los odio.
meh..
si se hicieran realidad seria divertido, pero bah
it won't happen.
así que, morfeo, deja de hacerme soñar bizarreces.